Free + Hang-gliding = Ugh . . .

Most of the time, free stuff is the best stuff. People never want things more than when they're free, even - no - especially, if it's stuff you'd never buy. And most don't equate a trip to one of the WDW parks with the word "free" for anything. Let's face it, you can spend as much as $11.00 for a burger or over $30 for a t-shirt. But let me tell you, when Disney does free, they do it like they do everything else - over the top. Which takes us to my most recent trip to Epcot for two "free" experiences: Club Cool and the Kim Possible World Showcase Adventure.

Club Cool is perhaps the coolest (ha, ha) and least known facet of Epcot. It can be described in two very tempting, very dangerous words: free pop. All you can drink free pop. Each of the pictured taps dispenses a carbonated beverage made by the Coca-Cola Company and each is distributed in a different country. I decided (for the good of of the blog, of course) that I would drink each sample in its entirety. Easy for most, like Krest Ginger Ale from Mozambique and Manzana Lift from Mexico. But then there it was, staring me in the face, just like my kids in anticipation. Beverly from Italy. I remember once my dad had a toothache and sucked on an aspirin to ease the pain, and every time I've sampled this "popular, non-alcoholic aperitif" which is supposed to "stimulate the appetite" I think of the look on his face, then I lose my appetite. Sometimes almost more. I managed about half of the Beverly, then began to slam Mezzo Mix, from Germany, desperate to rid my mouth of the bitterness. So I managed to drink the entire samples for all but one drink, which turns out to be about 16 ounces in less than 15 minutes. Needless to say, I was experiencing mild to moderate gastric distress for a little while afterward.

Eager to walk it off, we headed to the Kim Possible Station in Norway, a cart just outside of the pavilion. We were given a "Kimmunicator," a cell phone programmed to receive our directives, and walked to Germany to begin our mission on the Kim Possible World Showcase Adventure. We were given three different missions to find clues so we could catch the villain, Professor Dementor, from taking over the world with his mind control device - "look at all those people, walking around like they don't have a care in the world. It's like they're on . . . vacation!" Wade gives you tips and shows you pictures of where to go, and when you get to each spot there's a unique treat: the Kimmunicator activates unexpected movements from every-day looking objects. A cuckoo clock will sing a special tune or beer steins will sing. Finally, we stopped Professor Dementor's device and he was caught in a very public, very humorous scene in the town square. After the adventure was over, we put the Kimmunicator in a drop box hidden in plain sight. Our family loves this attraction. Almost every time we go to the World Showcase, we pick up a Kimmunicator, fight over who gets to hold it, go from clue to clue, fight over who gets to hold it, solve the mystery, and fight over who gets to put the Kimmunicator in the drop station. We've argued over this high-tech toy in Mexico, Norway, China, Japan, the UK & now Germany. Good times, good times.

We strolled around the rest of the countries and moved back into Future World pdq - we had Fastpasses for Soarin'! Now, remember my mild to moderate gastric distress? Yeah, so did I, except it wasn't a memory, it was still a very vivid reality. Luckily, I managed to hang on, and boy was I glad. Patrick Warburton (Puddy from Seinfeld fame) greeted us as our captain during the pre-show movie and we were ushered into the first row of seats on our "hang-glider." I love the first row. There are no dangling feet in front of me and I'm then surrounded by the curved-super screen as we're lifted into the air. As we flew over California, swaying and dipping through the air, we smelled the pine trees in the forest, the blossoms in the orange groves, the sea air from the Pacific. Too quickly, our "flight" ended and we were lowered back to Earth. DD, DH & I hurried to the exit to meet up with DS, who gets a tad bit of motion sickness from this attraction.

Speaking of motion sickness . . . my gastric distress was better! It's as if the hang-gliding motion cured me from my post-pop peptic disturbance.

Goosed - By a Duck (And I Don't Mean Donald)!

There's something wrong, yet so right, about going to Animal Kingdom, which celebrates animals and all their beauty, with the goal of eating meat. But that's exactly what DH and I set out to do last Monday (and yes, I'm writing about this a little late).

Our air conditioning went out last weekend, so we decided that while the kids were at school we would get out of the house. Of course, we chose the hottest of the four parks, but there was a method to that madness. The plan was to experience two attractions and lunch at Flame Tree Barbecue before we went home to meet the HVAC guy and the kids after school. But you know what they say about the best laid plans. As soon as we made it through the bag check line, the HVAC guy called DH to s

ay he'd be at our house between noon & 4, but would give us a courtesy call half an h

our before he arrived. It was 9:45am, so we decided to stay at the park and do what we could before he called - DH was not giving up his barbecue.

We headed to Kilimanjaro Safaris, which only had a 20 minute wait, so we queued up and then boarded our safari vehicle in the village of Harambe for the two week journey. The first leg of our safari was through the jungles of Africa, where we saw black rhinoceros, hippopotamus and nile crocodiles. After our harrowing trip across an old bridge, we moved into the plains. Some of my favorite animals of the trip are here, including zebras, warthogs ostriches and a male and female lion. Of course, it didn't get any better than viewing a small herd of elephants, probably around six, including a very young elephant. During this safari you are in "radio contact" with a warden, who gives tips on where to see some of the best examples of wildlife. Then the warden tells you that there are poachers, and your driver informs the party that you have to go off course to run the poachers off the property or try to catch them. There's "Disney Magic" gunfire and another shaky bridge, then - miracle of miracles - the warden's crew cau

ght the poachers and reunited the baby elephant with its mother just ahead of you. It's almost a shame, because this attraction is so fantastic, so interesting and so realistic, and then the imaginary is sprung on you in order to fill the distance between the animals' spaces and t

he station where you exit your ride vehicle. Even with the closing drama, this ride is a favorite of both DH and me. The animals appear to be so close they could walk right up to you and if you have a camera that can take all the bumps in the road, it's a great place for taking pictures.

After exiting our safari, we strolled through Harambe and found Tam Tam Congo playing near the Tusker House restaurant. They played drums to an amazing beat and held their audience in rapt attention while they played and danced. The guests clapped along and eventually some even joined in the performance when asked!

And now, on to that barbecue. Flame Tree Barbecue has long been a favorite of our family. We first ate there about three years ago and we've told all our Disney-bound friends about it as a "don't miss." I know a lot of people who frequent message boards and even guidebook writers express a certain confusion as to how a barbecue counter-service restaurant fits into the theme of Animal Kingdom. My only answer to that is the architecture of both the restaurant building and the picnic pavilions fit their surroundings very well. OK, I have two answers to that actually. The other answer is that I don't care! The food is good, the portions

are generous and the sauces are excellent!

DH & I are not the only beings, however, who feel this way about Flame Tree. I chose a table in the pavilion close to the water, overlooking Expedition Everest. As soon as DH arrived with the tray, we were surrounded by a flock of ibises and mallard ducks. I did my best to ignore them, knowing that feeding them only makes their attention worse, but then something really, um, uncomfortable, happened. There I was, trying to enjoy my roast half chicken, and I felt a "poke" on the side of my rear end! I looked over, and there she was, a Mallard Molester at my side. I was "goosed" by a duck! Freaked out and shrieking, I looked it straight in the eye, shouted "NO!" and tried to move on. Of course I had attracted a great deal of attention and had to explain my behavior to our neighboring guests, who then laughed, probably more at me than the situation.

Moving on, DH & I shared a little of each other's meals. His ribs were a little dry, but the spices were fantastic, and my chicken was perfect, just perfect. The best part of it was the skin, it was perfectly crispy and spicy and held the juices in the meat very well. A little tasty tip for those of you dining at Flame Tree in the future. The regular barbecue sauce is great on the chicken, and the "sweet & spicy" is perfect for the ribs.

After lunch we took a little walk around Discovery Island and watched the flamingos. We headed to the tram, and it left just as we were about to approach the queue. Then our little bit of Disney Magic for the day. A cast member approached in a golf cart offering a ride to our car! Thank you, Patrick! When we arrived at our car, the HVAC guy called. We went home and enjoyed the rest of our afternoon in air conditioned comfort.

There are those moments when everything moves into place to click together. Yesterday the kids and I went to Hollywood Studios with a plan, then it seemed like it definitely would not be one of those moments. DS requested to ride Toy Story Midway Mania, whether we got on relatively quickly or got FastPasses for much later. But then we arrived and the wait was an hour - which I was willing to wait and so was DD - but DS was not, and FPs were out for the rest of the day. He then started to cop this amazing attitude, which I was not about to take. It's still a pretty new attraction and not surprising to find the wait this long, which I explained to the boy, but he persisted in his poutiness.

We moved through Pixar Place to the Streets of America and on to Muppet Vision 3D. The plan was to see the movie and get some ice cream at Dinosaur Gertie's. Anything else would just be gravy. We pretty much stuck to the plan, but as I said earlier, sometimes there are moments when everything clicks into place. This particular afternoon became one of those times.

But first things first: Muppet Vision 3D. We walked in just as the hostess was telling us we'd be the last guests for this showing. After grabbing our 3D glasses we joined the crowd and walked right into the theater, which meant no pre-show. I was a bit disappointed, the pre-show here is pretty good, anything with Kermit & Gonzo (especially Gonzo) is funny. But we walked in and sat in the third row, center, sat back and watched. The show started with Statler & Waldorf's complaints from their box seats, an AA penguin orchestra rose from the stage and started to play, then the curtains rose and the "3D" moved out from the door into the crowd. The kids and I laughed at every bit, even though we've seen it a few times already, since we're big Muppet fans. I always forget about Sweetums' appearances, which are such a delight, and as it does every time, the show ends with a hilarious bang, courtesy of the Sweedish Chef ("mm-hmm, bork, bork, bork!").

Next up is our bit of Disney magic. We've seen the Jedi Training Academy more than once, one of which our DD was chosen, much to DS's dismay. He's a huge Star Wars fan and even recreates the light saber duels as he watches the movies with friends. Just as we were walking by the stage, we noticed a relatively small crowd with 10 minutes to go. I scooted him over to the line after he gave me that "please, can I, please can I?" smile. Finally the moment came when the Jedi Master chose his students. DS was called up on the stage and DD & I were thrilled. The kids were all shown basic light saber movements, how to chop off each arm at the shoulder, then each leg, to duck, then a final swipe at their opponent's head. Then, Darth Vader invaded the lesson. Each of the young padawans had their chance to defeat him and made their moves based on the instructions of the Jedi Master. Then it was DS's turn:

Not just as a proud mommy, but as a spectator, I noticed that the crowd really cheered for him in a way they didn't for the other padawans. I think it was because he didn't wait for the Jedi Master to give commands, he just went ahead and moved with it. When he was done and received his diploma, he had the widest smile on his face. I asked what he had thought of all the cheering and he said, "people were cheering? I guess I was too focused to notice!"

Then we celebrated with ice cream from Dinosaur Gertie's. Here's our review: it's pretty much standard soft serve, which we really like, but you get it from a huge brontosaurus belly. Cool way to end a very cool afternoon.

¡Por favor manténgase alejado de las puertas!

OK, all you Disney fans, you know where I'm going with this one. Or at least on what I was going. DH was thinking that the best way to start is at the beginning, and I absolutely love the monorail, so I couldn't agree more.

One "disadvantage" of living so close is that we're no longer vacationers staying on property. I used to look down my nose at the poor, sad guests who didn't have the experience of staying at a Disney resort. Herded through parking lots and onto trams, they weren't greeted with the magic of music at the resort, music on the bus, music at the gate and music throughout the midways. Then they were dumped off the tram at the end of the day, forced to rack their exhausted brains for reminders like "Goofy 52" and the stifling heat of their car, once they've found it, at the end of an August day in Central Florida. Now, we are those guests.

On the upside, we ride the monorail every time we visit Magic Kingdom. No longer receiving the "door to door" service of a Disney bus, we park at the TTC (Transportation & Ticket Center for the un-indoctrinated) only to be reminded that we are still a mile & a half away from the magic. We walk to the station, up the ramp, and then are greeted with a quick rush of air conditioning as the doors open. Then, the greeting, "Welcome aboard the Walt Disney World express monorail. Your highway in the sky. Please stand clear of the doors. ¡Por favor manténgase alejado de las puertas!" Music to my ears, it means we're on our way.

Of course, it's not all perfect every ride. If we can get a seat, we have to argue with DD over whether to sit riding forward (my preference) or backward (hers). Usually my motion sickness or the availability of seats determines the winner. If we can't get a seat, we have to try to keep everyone together, not bump into strangers when we move forward or stop and keep our hands from grabbing the door hinges, which look like poles for hanging on to, but aren't. Really, they aren't, they spin. And there are other dangers. One time, a gentleman from a middle eastern country and I had to share a pole. He moved his hand out of my way just as I was moving to hold on. He and I kept trying to avoid each other and finally settled on where to place our hands, and I joked, as people trying to get out of each others' way do, "Wanna dance?" He looked offended, not understanding my very forward, American joke and I felt like an idiot. That was one very long monorail ride.

So Monday, DH, DD & I went to Magic Kingdom for the official Four Parks, One Blog kickoff. It was slow, as it was about 3:30 in the afternoon, and a train had just pulled into the station. There was absolutely no one in front of us, and DH suggested we ask about riding up front. We both doubted it was possible, but I asked the cast member and he said no, that they aren't allowing that anymore, with a sort of finality. I'm not surprised at all, I doubt that Disney will allow guests in the driver's car any time in the near future. It's been a tough year for this part of the Mouse's family, and I expect they'll be given a lot of room to grieve.

We did, however, get the whole front half of the first passenger car to ourselves. We got to stretch out and watch the World go by. It was sunny and there was so much activity going on around us. There was even a boat going over the water bridge from Seven Seas Lagoon to Bay Lake. I must also say that Bay Lake Tower is a lovely building. Riding by and watching the sunlight glitter off the windows with the backdrop of the water makes for a beautiful scene.

We pulled into the station and exited the monorail. The station at Magic Kingdom is beautiful. Far less stark than the utilitarian TTC station, it has green wrought iron posts, the roof has a decorative trim, and brick floors. It really sets the tone for what is to come, and what is to come is . . .

Magic Kingdom. My favorite park, the one that represents Disney magic in nearly all forms. We decided to stick with the transportation theme for this blog entry, and chose to ride the full loop on the Walt Disney World Railroad. In that station, which mirrors the monorail station in style, we took a moment before boarding the train to watch the flip book movies and play with the baseball game. Once on the train, we took care to notice all we'd missed in the past. The details on the lamps which hang from the ceiling, brass accented and decorated with small scroll work. The lushness of the surrounding plant life. As we journeyed through Frontierland, we glimpsed Goofy signing autographs while dressed as a cowboy between Splash Mountain & Big Thunder Mountain Railroad, we took in the sights in Tumbleweed and watched the roller coaster ride through the tiny town and we enjoyed the view of the singing animals on the paddle wheel inside Splash Mountain.

To keep the riders occupied while riding around Fantasyland, there are some Native American scenes, as well as an excerpt of the song, "Colors of the Wind." There are some tee pees, people, AAs (audio-animatronics) of people and animals, and a few fake deer, and in that spot DH & I once saw a real deer nearby. We said, "wow! That is one realistic AA!" until it walked into the woods. Personally, this isn't my favorite part of the ride. I think music themed to the scenery would be fine, and no narration necessary. There are few opportunities to just sit and relax during your visits to the park while you still feel like you're actively experiencing something, and they should let guests enjoy just being in that moment.

The rest of the train ride is pleasant. Along the way you can see the inside of the park, like at the Mickey's Toontown Fair stop. You can see all along the midway here, and it reminds me there of what an old-fashioned amusement park would look like. Children carrying balloons, colorful scenery, the sounds of music and playful screams on Goofy's Barnstormer all make the view from the train more memorable. After Toontown, there is our favorite path, decorated with Alice in Wonderland characters that connects it with Tomorrowland. From the train we can see parts of the Tomorrowland Indy Speedway and the outside of Space Mountain. After we curled past the futuristic white "mountain" we headed into the station.

We wrapped up our visit with a walk through shops on Main Street and a few quick stops in Fantasyland and Liberty Square. We left the park that day satisfied with the start of our year-long tour and planning our next blog-inspired adventure. We boarded the monorail to the TTC and delighted once more that day in the words, "por favor manténgase alejado de las puertas."

The Journey Begins

Let's face it. Every guidebook about the Walt Disney World Resort tells you that there's so much to do, you can't possibly do everything during one vacation, and they're right! Four theme parks consisting of over 120 attractions, more than 80 restaurants and dozens of impromtu "streetmosphere" performances combine to provide the experience of the vacation (or for many of us, vacations) of a lifetime.

So I'm going out there to do it all. Every theme park, every ride, every restaurant, every show, every mile, and all in one year.

After moving to Celebration in January, my family and I have gone to the parks, riding the same rides and seeing the same shows over and over. My husband suggested after riding the Liberty Belle in Magic Kingdom (for the first time ever!) that we shake things up a bit, that we list it all and then cross them off, one by one.

The Cast:

My husband (DH), our kids (DD & DS) and me! A minimum of two of us have to participate so that there are multiple points of view. Occasionally, a guest author may make an appearance, maybe a "Ghost Writer" of sorts (think 999 Happy Haunts). After all, different family members, different opinions. What are the chances we'll all see eye-to-eye? Unless, of course, we're at the Laugh Floor.

The Stage:

The four main theme parks at the Walt Disney World Resort. For now, I'm sticking with those, although from time to time you may see a special "on location" review of a non-park area.

Act I: Attractions

Two per blog entry. Mostly we're sticking to anything with an official que, but parades, fireworks shows & occasionally uniquely-Disney modes of transportation may make guest appearances.

Act II: Food

One per blog entry. We count all food served in or from a permanent building. Table service is a given, but for example, a Dole Whip from Aloha Isle counts, but a Mickey Bar from a cart does not - not that they won't be consumed, they're just not part of the challenge!

Act III: Streetmosphere

About one per week, but mostly when they fit. We'll do our best to find all the talking trash cans, kilted guitar players and leaf-attired stilt walkers, but leaving those experiences to Disney magic often makes the best memories.

The Cast Parties

A big part of the fun is sharing these adventures with you. Throughout the year, we'll celebrate four birthdays, a wedding anniversary, holidays and (hopefully) visits from family & friends. Two blog entries per week will cover all the experiences from the parks and more! So as our dear friend says, "See ya real soon!"